Halfway Down Aisle 12

Free! We all love that word. With supply and demand forcing prices to continue to rise, we, as a whole, find ourselves being thrifty to make ends meet. Price tags on items often dictate whether we can afford to purchase certain things. Going to the grocery store is often a chore. The expense of milk, bread, eggs, butter, etc., can be frustrating and discouraging! Most people fail to realize that you can find yourself a family-sized bag of “Positivity” down Aisle 12! It’s right next to the Doritos! You’ll also see the name-brand version “Positive” on the cereal right next to the pop-tarts!

The nutritional facts label contains the ingredients, serving size, and percent of the daily value. As you wheel that wobbly wheeled cart to the self-checkout, you’ll discover the item doesn’t scan. The bar code doesn’t exist on this product. That’s right, it’s free. The generic version does, in fact, taste the same! There is no expiration date on Positive. The net weight of Positivity is not scaled, and Positive is also available in a sharing size. According to the general surgeon, women should devour Positivity before, during, and after pregnancy as there is no risk of birth defects. Consuming Positivity will not impair your ability to drive or operate heavy machinery and may cause fewer health problems.

This product is made worldwide. Positive does guarantee its’ quality and freshness and invites you to enjoy some of its yummy goodness today!!! So now that Positive & Positivity have a brand and label, we must disclose that it’s environmentally safe and must be 100% recycled!

Do you still love the word free?